On 6th May, 24 Members gathered in the Keystone Hall for our monthly get together.
We had a delicious dinner and good company followed
by a talk from Di Veal from Relate. Di has given us a general talk before
about her work at Relate, but this time she was more specific and talked
about domestic violence.
Relate is classed as a self funding charity and relies on Test Valley Borough Council, Winchester City Council and Eastleigh Council for some of its income. Unfortunately these councils are constantly under pressure to put our money elsewhere and the funding that Relate receives is growing smaller every year. Relate then relies on gifts and donations from various organisations and tries its best to raise funds itself by giving talks etc to organisations such as ourselves.
It costs £37.81 for relate to provide one hour of counselling. But Relate does not force clients to pay if they are unable and suggests a donation of not less that £5.00 per session for those on a meagre income.
There is now more domestic violence than 10 years ago. Domestic violence has only been considered a crime in the last couple of decades and rape within marriage has only been illegal since 1981.
It isn’t only men who commit domestic violence, women are also to blame. The main question asked of a woman who is the victim, is why don’t you leave? But often the victim feels that they have entered into a contract with the man and they still feel very attached. They are promised that it will never happen again and still have love for their partner. Recent research has shown that a woman will be abused approximately 35 times before she leaves. The issue is very often also complicated by alcohol and/or drug abuse. Research has also shown that 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence at some time in their relationship.
Relate works hard to overcome the difficulties that the couple are going through. For instance they try to ascertain whether there is any mental health issues, and whether the partnership is salvageable. If it isn’t then they help the couple to separate amicably.
After a lively question and answer session Di was thanked for her interesting and informative talk and was presented with a donation on behalf of the club to help Relate with its work in the future.